Big Boys Do Cry

That's how I felt after I spent $80 at Big Mamma's Boy. The description was so intriguing: front patio, back patio, lounge, and a cozy dining room in a Victorian house. The menu uses naturally raised or organic ingredients (when possible) and the flour can be gluten-free. Unfortunately, this restaurants fits the old adage about "good intentions". Sometimes earnestness is so boring.

That was my conclusion after I had a couple of bites of their pizza. I picked the Cabbagetown, and it's not going to go on to my list of Best Pizza in Toronto nominees. What stood out for me was the bland, card-board crust. It reminded me of all those cheap, made-in-the-grocery store pizzas I had when I was young. Well, that's all well and good if you used to be a poor immigrant but dag-nab-it, I'm rolling in bling now and I want a pizza party in my mouth.

Next up was smothered chicken: skin-less baked chicken with mashed potatoes and greens. I'm not sure what was the chicken supposed to be smothered in, perhaps a tiny pillowcase to put it out of its culinary misery. I could only conclude this is what Shake-and-Bake must taste like. For even at our most string-purse-tightening-est, we did not partake of this North American tradition.

The final dish was beef lasagna. Lasagna is still a pasta. So it's particularly tasteless when you over-cook it to the point that it falls apart with a single bite. I like more chewiness to my carb. As a personal preference, I'd like a bit of a burnt taste to my cheeses too.

In any case, I'm going to pass on this Cabbagetown institution. Also, does the out-sized-ness belong to the boy or his mama?