They Also Serve Who Only Stand And Wait

On the 2nd night of Hot Docs, I attended the premiere of Dish: Women, Waitressing, and The Art of Service at the Bloor Cinema. From Toronto and its environs, to Montreal, and onto Paris and Tokyo, we see how waitresses are treated and how they interact with customers. It's no surprise that men project their own desires onto their servers, and the women have to be friendly and sometimes flirtatious while deflating (ha!) any potential desire. But it is interesting that the people who give them the hardest time are women customers.

While women work many waitressing jobs in North America because it's seen as a menial occupation, the opposite is true in France. Restaurant servers are a serious vocation there, especially in the "grandes maisons" (haute cuisine restaurants), and women are perceived to be physically, emotionally, and traditionally unqualified to have those jobs. In Japan, the implicit role of a typical waitress as confidante and "girlfriend", is made explicit in "Maid Cafes". The customer's whims are catered to and their egos soothed.

The film doesn't really explore any situations that most people aren't aware of, except perhaps with "Housters", the Hooters substitute in Montreal, or the diner where topless waitresses serve food, also in Montreal. Both of these are revelation to me!

I feel that there is some bias or judicious editing with this film. North America doesn't just have diners and cheap restaurants. How do women fare as waitstaff in the high-end restaurants here? Also, what about the "ethnic" restaurants? Do women work there? Are their experiences similar or different? Similarly, not every Parisian boite serves haute cuisine. Finally, Tokyo is a megalopolis of almost 40 million people (in the Greater Tokyo Area). Maid Cafes represent such a tiny fraction of the Japanese restaurant business. Using them play nicely into the narrative of the "role-play" of waitresses that the film espouses, especially with a nod to the geisha tradition. But this feels too much the stereo-typical narrative of "subservient asian female vs. patriarchical asian male".

Interestingly, before the movie I had dinner at Insomnia and being cognizant of both the theme of the upcoming movie as well as this related human interest article. So I was bemused as mywaitress deployed the full arsenal of waitressing including: giving out her name, being extremely gregarious and friendly, calling everybody "honey" or "love", and wearing a tight-fitting dress that showed off her ample assets. It's like watching a magician when you know the secret to the magic tricks.